I just talked to the girl I've loved and devoted my life to for 4 months. I'm confused because it doesn't feel right anymore. When I talk to her I don't feel the same feelings. I don't have the same feelings as I used to.
I wrote this yesterday:
Hi everyone this should be interesting because my life is very interesting. This is just some stuff thats been on my mind lately that i have to get out. I'm vegetarian, wiccan, and bisexual.
The most important person in my life right now is my girl janelle. On bolt u know her as nellegrl03. I love her more than life itself. We plan to get married some day.
Lately I've been feeling kinda different. Alot has been going on. Nelle moved and we can't talk to each other much unless we have a phone card. So we can't wait for school to start again where we can see each other everyday. the last couple of weeks have been really hard.
When nelle and i couldn't talk for a couple of days i started talking to this boy i know from school online.
I knew he liked me and i'd also told him already that i couldn't go out with him because i was involved. But we still talked. He said the sweetest things and we got to know each other better. The thing that really broke my heart is when he said this:
"There's this girl i know i really got a thing for, but she's involved. though i'm losin my head, i'd still rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. i know i'm in over my head, but she drives me crazy. idk, maybe you know her, you might if i tell you her name." I'll always cherish those words.

But the worst thing is that he said all this when nelle and i we're really feeling the separation and it was hurting us the most. I started to think twice. He saw me before nell or neone did. I really wish i could give him a chance but i love nell too much to leave her. It would hurt too much. and i like what we have together.

Janelle and I have something special. It takes alot of trust and committment to build the kind of relationship we have. We tell each other everything and hold back nothing. I can always count on her no matter what. I have to admit it wasn't always like this. The beginning was a little rocky but we've put that behind us.
Shes the more romantic mushy gushy one. I swear she has this book in her head and as soon as she opens it it just all comes pouring out! She says its because she loves me so much and it just comes to her because she could talk about me forever. She wrote this 3 page story about how she feels about me and it almost brought me to tears.Our relationship almost seems too perfect. I only wish that everyone could see it and realize how much we love each other.