Friday, October 31, 2003
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
day in and day out
i look to see u there
your eyes fill me with love
your soul brings me joy
With u i become fulifilled
i wish it may i wish it might
From the very first day we met
I knew i'd be best friends with u
Just looking across the room
your thoughts touched mine
apparently our plans coincided
because just look at us now
at one point we were inseparable
some say even attatched at the hip
now i begin to wonder
i dreamt you'd always be there
lingering in the deep dark light
I ponder where it all began
and if so where it all might end
u say stuff that hurts
and my heart struggles to forget
It digs deep down
I bleed from within
but day after day
i just sit and give in
I kno i'll alway stick around
because i just can't bare to say no
there'd be too much lost
too much about u to let go
I begin to wonder if its really meant to be
If only i knew all the answers
If only life were much simpler then it is
but its not so i'll just take it all in stride
I'll let God give me the answers
to this freaken roller coaster ride
I'll drift upon this earth
like a leaf fallen from a vine
flying through the air
without a menial care
I try to understand why nothing seems to be fair
Maybe someday...
maybe someday I'll be what u want me to be
or is it what i want me to be?
some listless yet hopeful day we might find out
but for now the mystery descends or ascends
will it unravel?
who knos...
where it all will go
where it all will end?
and much much more
Precious moments remain until then...
and as quoted form mike:
some sadistic subconcience keeps me going for what twisted pleasures i know not...
i look to see u there
your eyes fill me with love
your soul brings me joy
With u i become fulifilled
i wish it may i wish it might
From the very first day we met
I knew i'd be best friends with u
Just looking across the room
your thoughts touched mine
apparently our plans coincided
because just look at us now
at one point we were inseparable
some say even attatched at the hip
now i begin to wonder
i dreamt you'd always be there
lingering in the deep dark light
I ponder where it all began
and if so where it all might end
u say stuff that hurts
and my heart struggles to forget
It digs deep down
I bleed from within
but day after day
i just sit and give in
I kno i'll alway stick around
because i just can't bare to say no
there'd be too much lost
too much about u to let go
I begin to wonder if its really meant to be
If only i knew all the answers
If only life were much simpler then it is
but its not so i'll just take it all in stride
I'll let God give me the answers
to this freaken roller coaster ride
I'll drift upon this earth
like a leaf fallen from a vine
flying through the air
without a menial care
I try to understand why nothing seems to be fair
Maybe someday...
maybe someday I'll be what u want me to be
or is it what i want me to be?
some listless yet hopeful day we might find out
but for now the mystery descends or ascends
will it unravel?
who knos...
where it all will go
where it all will end?
and much much more
Precious moments remain until then...
and as quoted form mike:
some sadistic subconcience keeps me going for what twisted pleasures i know not...
O Wonderful life-breath your glory upon me-give me strength-give me power-so be it
Life is good. I've been told i looked like christina aguilara today. I talked to a bird. By next week i'll be 6-3 in fantasy football and kicking everyones ass. Even Greg the God of football. Move over cuz Jess is taking over!! I kno i kno that was lame. I'm just very tired and i get competitive with football. oh and we're having the good kind of chicken for dinner. It can't get ne better!! Ohhh and tomorrow's a half day. and there's dress down days all week long. This week kicks serious ass.
The only bad thing is Ryan wasn't in school today. :-( I don't know what i can do to give him the motivation he needs to get his work done. I just wish i could be right there for him helping him to concentrate but i can't do that because of parents. The most i can do is send my love and keep bugging him about all of his assignments without seeming so much like his mom that he ignores me. There's a fine line to balance it all upon. I just know hes worthy of so much more then Uconn. So i don't wanna see that happen. please babe i love you do your work!!
g2g do some english extra credit...ciao!
The only bad thing is Ryan wasn't in school today. :-( I don't know what i can do to give him the motivation he needs to get his work done. I just wish i could be right there for him helping him to concentrate but i can't do that because of parents. The most i can do is send my love and keep bugging him about all of his assignments without seeming so much like his mom that he ignores me. There's a fine line to balance it all upon. I just know hes worthy of so much more then Uconn. So i don't wanna see that happen. please babe i love you do your work!!
g2g do some english extra credit...ciao!
Monday, October 27, 2003
Sunday, October 26, 2003
Chantal Kreviazuk-What if it All Means Something
If I could do anything for you, believe me I would
Do you feel the same? Feel the same as me?
If I could be anyone for you believe me I would
I'm not ashamed not ashamed to be
Its hard for me to know sometimes I feel like letting go
But what if it all means something?
What if it all
What if it all means something?
What if it all
If I could go anywhere for you, believe me I would
I'd run away, I'd ran away,
I'd leave.
If I could fix everything for you, believe me I would
Do you feel the same, feel the same as me?
Its hard for me to know, well maybe I should just let go.
But what if it all means something?
What if it all
What if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
Leave me alone
I'm falling
If I could do anything for you, believe me I would
Do you feel the same? Feel the same as me?
Its hard for me to know well maybe I should just let go
But what if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
What if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
Yeah what if it all means something, something, something
I know it all means something.
Do you feel the same? Feel the same as me?
If I could be anyone for you believe me I would
I'm not ashamed not ashamed to be
Its hard for me to know sometimes I feel like letting go
But what if it all means something?
What if it all
What if it all means something?
What if it all
If I could go anywhere for you, believe me I would
I'd run away, I'd ran away,
I'd leave.
If I could fix everything for you, believe me I would
Do you feel the same, feel the same as me?
Its hard for me to know, well maybe I should just let go.
But what if it all means something?
What if it all
What if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
Leave me alone
I'm falling
If I could do anything for you, believe me I would
Do you feel the same? Feel the same as me?
Its hard for me to know well maybe I should just let go
But what if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
What if it all means something?
(I wanna know)
What if it all
Yeah what if it all means something, something, something
I know it all means something.
Yesterday went well. I saw brent this kid that used to have a crush on me when i was in like 5th grade. He asked me if i was a good girl or a bad girl. I said i dunno i'm just me. lol
Shannon was so awesome during the whole ceremony. She didn't cry once. I can just tell shes gonna be something great when she grows up.
Ryan didn't end up being able to come with me. So i was kinda bored but i found stuff to do. I got home around 7:30 and then he came over. I was sitting upstairs working on hw and all the sudden the dogs started barking. It was a good surprise. but he left around 11. :-(
I don't wanna go to school tomorrow. too much hw...
Shannon was so awesome during the whole ceremony. She didn't cry once. I can just tell shes gonna be something great when she grows up.
Ryan didn't end up being able to come with me. So i was kinda bored but i found stuff to do. I got home around 7:30 and then he came over. I was sitting upstairs working on hw and all the sudden the dogs started barking. It was a good surprise. but he left around 11. :-(
I don't wanna go to school tomorrow. too much hw...
Wednesday, October 22, 2003
ok so ryan calls me at 9. Guess what? we're going to look at colleges! lol so i took a really quick shower and ran out the door and we spent the day in Boston with his dad. We went to BU and BC. Boston University had a horrible campus. Boston College had an awesome campus but it just seemed like a bigger version of east catholic and i dunno that was scary. So the college search is far from over on my part. I really think i'll go somewhere warm for college. That would be a big plus. maybe hawaii or something. It was so damn cold today and we spent alot of the time outside walking around campus.
I have a ton of work to do. a couple different projects and a take home test. So i'll be up a while...
I have a ton of work to do. a couple different projects and a take home test. So i'll be up a while...
Tuesday, October 21, 2003
Monday, October 20, 2003
Why am i so tired? I slept 13 hours last night. I just didn't wanna wake up for school today so i didn't. I have so much stuff to do and not enough time. The psats are tomorrow and i really wanted to study so much more then i have. but its ok. i kno i'll do well. I just could have done so much better. My little sister Shannon's baptism is coming up soon. I'm really hoping ryan can come to it. It's on a saturday so i think he will be able to come...but who knows cuz his parents are crazy.
I havn't seen Shannon in so long. I really miss her a ton. Shes such a cutie. The party after should be cool too because it's at stash's cafe and like my whole family should be there.
Patriots won the game yesterday!!! woo hoo!! it was a good one. It went into overtime because they were tied with miami 13 to 13. but then brady threw the ball to the endzone and they made a touchdown. So the final score was 19-13. I kno good stuff!
I have to get together to discuss outing club stuff with mr. scorco but i think it will have to wait till moday because i don't have netime this week.:-(
Its funny i miss hanging out with nick. but i really don't think he misses hanging with me. So i make myself forget that i miss it. Denial its such a great thing. I kno he reads my blog. but i think hes too lazy to read everything above this. So he wont get this far. :-P My other theory is that i could write it in words too big for him to comprehend. lol or i could write it in spanish and he'd be too lazy to translate it. but no i'll just stick with my first one. I don't care if he reads it neway. I just miss his adorable laugh and cute smiles. and the way he'd always make fun of me. or the way that i could always predict what he was doing or thinking. now i'll talk to him and feel like thats all gone. but what did i really expect? I guess its prob good that it is.
Off to take the practice psat. ciao
I havn't seen Shannon in so long. I really miss her a ton. Shes such a cutie. The party after should be cool too because it's at stash's cafe and like my whole family should be there.
Patriots won the game yesterday!!! woo hoo!! it was a good one. It went into overtime because they were tied with miami 13 to 13. but then brady threw the ball to the endzone and they made a touchdown. So the final score was 19-13. I kno good stuff!
I have to get together to discuss outing club stuff with mr. scorco but i think it will have to wait till moday because i don't have netime this week.:-(
Its funny i miss hanging out with nick. but i really don't think he misses hanging with me. So i make myself forget that i miss it. Denial its such a great thing. I kno he reads my blog. but i think hes too lazy to read everything above this. So he wont get this far. :-P My other theory is that i could write it in words too big for him to comprehend. lol or i could write it in spanish and he'd be too lazy to translate it. but no i'll just stick with my first one. I don't care if he reads it neway. I just miss his adorable laugh and cute smiles. and the way he'd always make fun of me. or the way that i could always predict what he was doing or thinking. now i'll talk to him and feel like thats all gone. but what did i really expect? I guess its prob good that it is.
Off to take the practice psat. ciao
Sunday, October 19, 2003
Thursday, October 16, 2003
it's essential to face the world with a childlike perspective. Keep your innocence. Stay true to your beliefs and always have faith. Allow yourself to stray every now and then. For everytime u do you learn something new. Just remember where home is. Be aware of all truths not just innocence. Ignorance is an aversion to prosperity. Success in the physical world means nothing if you're not spiritually content...
Monday, October 06, 2003
Sunday, October 05, 2003
Saturday, October 04, 2003
Some people tell me, that you're not my kind
And i believe them, but i can't get you out of my mind
Some people tell me that i should stay away
Maybe I will... some other day
'Cause it feel right
And it feels good
And i don't do always what i should
And I know what makes me happy
And in my heart you're it exactly
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
I'll learn my lessons, and i'll make mistakes
And If i get burned (get burned), it'll be my heart to break
It isn't easy, hearing what they say
Sometimes you've got to take a leap of faith
'Cause it feel right
And it feels good
And I'm not gonna do something stupid
Just this once, i wanna feel like
I can do what i want when i hold tight
[Chorus:]
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
[Bridge:]
Anyone, who's ever been in love
Has got to know
What it means to have a dream
And no one can say anything
To change my mind, no, not this time
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
Baby, got time to grow up...
.. to face responsibility...
...hopin'... open...
Cause I'm only 17...
And i believe them, but i can't get you out of my mind
Some people tell me that i should stay away
Maybe I will... some other day
'Cause it feel right
And it feels good
And i don't do always what i should
And I know what makes me happy
And in my heart you're it exactly
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
I'll learn my lessons, and i'll make mistakes
And If i get burned (get burned), it'll be my heart to break
It isn't easy, hearing what they say
Sometimes you've got to take a leap of faith
'Cause it feel right
And it feels good
And I'm not gonna do something stupid
Just this once, i wanna feel like
I can do what i want when i hold tight
[Chorus:]
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
[Bridge:]
Anyone, who's ever been in love
Has got to know
What it means to have a dream
And no one can say anything
To change my mind, no, not this time
I don't wanna do right, I just want you tonight
Not just only in my dreams
Save my best behavior, for a little later
'Cause I'm only 17
Think i made my mind up, i got time to grow up
Face responsibility
Livin' in the moment, keepin' my heart open
While I'm only 17
(Only 17...)
Baby, got time to grow up...
.. to face responsibility...
...hopin'... open...
Cause I'm only 17...
Wednesday, October 01, 2003
This week has been bittersweet. lots has happened. too complicated to explain it all now. Even then i'm not really sure if its worth it because everything seems transient... so thats why i hesitate. Hopefully the answers will come to me soon.
Other then that tomorrow is the junior retreat. I'm not really sure who exactly is going. I just know it cost alot of money!! But its worth it to dress down and get a day off from school don't u think? It'd be cool if i could get something spiritual out of it too but from past experiences my class just takes it as a joke.
Other then that tomorrow is the junior retreat. I'm not really sure who exactly is going. I just know it cost alot of money!! But its worth it to dress down and get a day off from school don't u think? It'd be cool if i could get something spiritual out of it too but from past experiences my class just takes it as a joke.